Communication

Dating long distance isn't something people typically seek out when looking for a potential partner. There is a distinct stigma on long distance relationships in today's society, despite the vast amount of new communication technology. When I tell people my boyfriend lives in South Korea, I usually get a surprised expression mixed with a well-meaning "Oh wow, that's so far away." I usually smile and agree politely, but inside I'm just thinking, "If you only knew." Dating long distance is a special circumstance that one can only understood by experience. Even if your significant other is only a few towns away, there is a distinct void that can be felt by the simple fact that you are apart.

However, not EVERYTHING about long distance is sad or horrible. It can actually work pretty well once you get into the swing of things.The biggest factor that plays into a successful long distance relationship is communication. Because face-to-face conversations aren't always feasible, it is up to the both of you to communicate clearly and openly with one another in order to keep your relationship strong. This can be tough in the beginning, especially if you didn't have an established friendship with this person before you started dating. Getting to know someone over text and Skype is difficult...but not impossible. This actually opens some interesting doors that might have otherwise been closed in a traditional relationship.

DOOR 1: You rarely run out of things to talk about.

Because you aren't together 24/7, you build up discussion topics to want to share with your significant other the next time you talk. If there is a major time zone difference or your boyfriend/girlfriend can only talk on weekends, you create a mental checklist of things you want to tell them, and when you finally get to talk, the conversation is continual and interesting. And even if the conversation does stall, you can always talk about how the weather is where you are.

DOOR 2: You aren't expected to keep in constant contact.

One of the major issues with technology today is that we are constantly connected to one another. Whether we are Facebooking, Tweeting, texting, emailing or Snapchatting, we are always communicating with one another. An upside to long distance relationships, especially military ones, is that your significant other will most likely understand if you can't reply right away or if you have to wait til the weekend to call. There is a 14 hour time difference between my boyfriend and I, and we've gotten on a pretty predictable schedule of when we can talk. We still communicate regularly, but we understand that we are both busy, and talking all the time isn't reasonable. Plus, when you aren't expected to be in constant contact with someone, you can freely go about your day and take care of what you need to without worrying about checking in all the time.

DOOR 3: Communication becomes creative.

When you live thousands of miles away from the person you love, you find that talking and texting don't always do your feelings justice. So, when a phone call just won't do, you can break out your stationary and your favorite pens and write letters and cards and notes to your significant other. This, along with care packages, post cards, and other small gifts are like treasure to military members. And even if your love isn't in the military, a handwritten letter or a personally assembled package will meant the world to them because it shows that you took the time and effort to express just how special they are to you. Letters are also far more personal and intimate than texts and emails. They are a physical piece of matter that they can keep and read over and over again to remind themselves of how much they love you. And if they write back, you can do the same.




 So you see? Even though the initial feeling of communicating long distance seems difficult, it can actually be quite advantageous if you look at it from the right angle. And remember, it will probably be difficult at first. And that's okay. Any relationship has it's "figuring it out" phase. But once you do figure it out, you will find that those original fears start to fade away, and the task at had doesn't seem so daunting.



*image from images.frompo.com